How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
