I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize