I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I am available for nakedness
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
