Dual....:-)
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
