***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
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