Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
false alarm, still single
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize