i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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