Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
