that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
