I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
what day is it and did you see me today?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
