Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
