Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You are a genius and a whore.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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