small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
