You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
