I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
