I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
