I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
