dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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