if i can run in heels then i can drive
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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