If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize