There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
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