i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
