just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
