Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
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