i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
well you can't waste a boner
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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