I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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