just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Randomize
