Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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