so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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