Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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