I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
