I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
