i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
