I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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