Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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