If that was your dad, he is hot
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I could fuck to npr.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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