69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
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