D3 body, D1 cock
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
