You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
