screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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