why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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