I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
