I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
