ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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