I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
