3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
