it wasn't lemon gatorade
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
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