It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
PS: I just woke up from my shower
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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