I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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