the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
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