Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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